REFLECTIONS...
It is sad how we go about our lives, taking everything for granted along the way. What makes it even worse is that it takes a horrible event to make us realize it.
Sunday was one of those days I will never forget. After spending Saturday night at a friend's house, I ended up turning my phone off once I got home. Next thing I know...Josh is turning on the TV in the bedroom, and I could not believe my eyes. At the time, I only knew that one friend was due to fly out on that Comair flight. I will never forget turning on my phone...and hearing Beth's voicemail. "Andrea, call me as soon as you get this." I could tell in her voice that something was wrong. I was relieved when I heard that our friend had missed the flight...and even said "thank g*d." Then the bad news I was waiting for came. "But Bobbie, Cecil, and Erik Harris were on the flight." I froze. As I watched the TV I could not imagine that this was happening again in my "backyard." By the time I got to work many had already gathered and the look of shock was on everyone's faces. Everyone was just looking at eachother, their eyes begging someone to tell them it was a mistake, a bad dream, anything but the truth. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. These people had girlfriends, young daughters, brothers, parents....how were these people learning of this? Was someone with them? It was so much to take in, I could not even shed tears.....
No words can describe the pain I have seen at work this week. I have seen grown men break down and cry. I have seen families come to the workplace of their departed loved ones and just stare at their desks in disbelief. I have seen people who have never said a word to eachother hug and provide a shoulder to lean on.
This week, everyone is equal and everyone is hurting.
It may seem weird, but the truth hit me when I was least expecting it. I was laying in bed the other night....and I opened my eyes and saw Josh asleep...nose to nose with me..curled up with his pillow like he always does. It was at that moment that it hit me. Here I was, like I have been many times before, but this time it was different. I was blessed enough to be able to fall asleep next to him...listening to his breathing...smelling his breath....watching his eyelids twitch like they do when he falls into deep sleep. My friend does not. Instead she is grieving the loss of her love. She is trying to rebuild her life and wondering what the next step is. "She is destroyed". A feeling of such sadness fell over me...all I could do was silently cry. Since that night, I have treasured every moment I get to spend with my friends and loved ones. I have truly learned that life is too short.
Those lost will never be forgotten. At first I really did not think I knew them that well, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that I did hang out with them quite a bit. Whether it be at Shamrocks, or just some party....we at Galls truly are a family....and it has never been more clear then now. Although many might not think it, we will get thru it, and we will make it together. And we will all be there when Toni returns, to support and love her. This is not going to be easy..but it will be ok. We all lost friends who we will never forget. What we have to remember is that it will not be over in a week or two. It will take some time....and even after a while, the little things will bring back the memories....but that is what keeps the memories alive.